Ladies and gentlemen, I have found something truly spectacular. Three times in the last two days, the following catalogue has fallen from my magazine/home shopping box. Behold: Presents For Men.

At first flick, I was settling in for some general female-exclusion. I was warming up my feminist muscles in preparation. But on closer inspection, I realised something. This brochure isn’t just massively sexist towards women, but also massively sexist towards men. Two sexes in one go? I’d be impressed if I had the time, but I’m too busy pounding my head off the desk.

Exhibit A: Morph Keyring
Sexist towards women because: Are they saying that Morph is only for the blokes? I love Morph!
Sexist towards men because: It effectively says that men are immature – give them cartoon characters and they’ll be happy.

Exhibit B: Their book selection
Sexist towards women because: Again – is gardening a particularly ‘male’ activity? What is ‘male’ about saying no to arthritis? Are sport-related books a no-go area for the ladies?
Sexist towards men because: Again – it does rather reduce their areas of interest. Men are allowed to like: sport, gardening, and fart jokes. I do grant them tiny kudos for including ‘Green Crafts for Children’, but it rather pales into insignificance compared to the rest.

Exhibit C: Their ’special gifts’ page
Just take a look at this. With the possible example of ties and boxer shorts – and I’m not saying women CAN’T wear those things, I’m just saying it’s more understandable as to why they’d be labelled as ‘for men’ – what of those things are particularly ‘male’? Yet at the same time, it totally compartmentalises men’s interests.

…with one exception. The flowers (top right). I can only imagine these have strayed for the handy ‘Gifts for the Girls’ tab. Yes ladies, we’re catered for too! Look at all that lovely pink. So, according to this website, men are men, but women are girls. Excellent. Not to mention the fact that ‘things for girls’ is just a subsection of a ‘men’s’ website. The imagery is just too precious. Why couldn’t it just be a gift ideas catalogue? Why do they have to specify which sex different things are applicable to?

And this is just plain UGH.